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Buffalo Bills Jokes  

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  • Have you heard that the phone company changed the area code for Buffalo? 0-4-4.
  • Did you hear about the joke that EJ Manuel told his receivers? It went over their heads.
  • What do the Buffalo Bills and the mailman have in common? Neither deliver on Sunday.
  • What's the best part about dating a Bills fan? She won't be asking for a ring!
  • What is the difference between a Bills fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after awhile.
  • How do you keep an Buffalo Bills out of your yard? Put up goal posts.
  • Did you hear about the joke that Tyrod Taylor told his receivers? It went over their heads.
  • Why can't Tyrod Taylor use the phone anymore? Because he can't find the receiver.
  • How do you know the New York Police are seriously enforcing the Speed Limits into Buffalo. For the first offense, they give you two Buffalo Bills tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.
  • What does BILLS stand for?1: Blew It Like Last Season.2: Boy, I Love Losing Superbowls.
  • If you have a car containing a Bills wide receiver, a Bills linebacker, and a Bills defensive back, who is driving the car? The cop.
  • Where do you go in Buffalo in case of a tornado? Ralph Wilson Stadium - they never get a touchdown there!
  • Why do the Buffalo Bills want to change their name to the Buffalo Tampons? Because they are only good for one period and do not have a second string!
  • What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl? The Buffalo Bills.
  • What do the Buffalo Bills and possums have in common? Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
  • Why are the New York Jets like Hillary Clinton? Both have Bills to push around.
  • How did the Buffalo Bills fan die from drinking milk?. The cow fell on him!
  • What's the difference between the Buffalo Bills & the Taliban? The Taliban has a running game!
  • What's the difference between Buffalo Bills fans and mosquitoes? Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer.
  • What do you call an Buffalo Bill with a Super Bowl ring? A thief.
  • What do the Buffalo Bills and a Chick-Fil-A manager have in common? Neither one shows up for work on Sunday.
  • Did you hear that Buffalo's football team doesn't have a website? They can't string three "Ws" together.
  • Why is Sammy Watkins like a grizzly bear? Every fall he goes into hibernation.
  • What does an Buffalo Bills fan do when his team has won the Super Bowl? He turns off the PlayStation 3.
  • What did the Bills fan say after his team won the Super Bowl? "Dammit mom, why'd you wake me up? I was having an amazing dream!"
  • How do you stop an Buffalo Bills fan from beating his wife? Dress her in a Patriots jersey.
  • Why do Buffalo Bills fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? So they can park in handicap spaces.
  • How many Buffalo Bills does it take to win a Super Bowl? Nobody knows and we may never find out!
  • How are the Buffalo Bills like my neighbors? . They can't pick up a single yard!
  • What do the Bills and the Post Office have in common? Neither deliver on Sundays!
  • What should you do if you find three Buffalo Bills football fans buried up to their neck in cement? Get more cement.
  • What is the new Bills official cologne creating a lot of buzz? You wear it and the other guy scores.
  • How do you stop an Buffalo Bills fan from beating his wife? Dress her in New England Red White and Blue!
  • How do the Bills count to 10? 0-1, 0-2, 0-3, 0-4, 0-5, 0-6, 0-7, 0-8, 0-9, 0-10.
  • Why are so many Buffalo Bills players claiming they have the Swine Flu? So They don't have to touch the pigskin!
  • Did you hear that someone purchased the Buffalo Bills and is going to move them to Alaska? They are going to rename them the Arctic Chokes.
  • How are the Buffalo Bills like my neighbors? They can't pick up a single yard!
  • How do you know the New York State Police are seriously enforcing the Speed Limits into Buffalo? For the first offense, they give you two Bills tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.
  • Want to hear a Buffalo Bills joke? Sammy Watkins!
  • What do you call a beautiful girl in Buffalo? A tourist.
  • How many Buffalo Bills fans does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Lava lamps don't burn out man!
  • What's the difference between an Buffalo Bills fan and a carp? One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
  • What will happen if the Buffalo Bills actually win a playoff game? Hell will freeze over!
  • How do you know the Bills had a 8-8 record this year? 8 arrests and 8 convictions.
  • Why are Buffalo Bills jokes getting dumber and dumber?? Because Bills fans have started to make them up themselves.
  • What's the difference between the Buffalo Bills and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  • What do the Buffalo Bills and Billy Graham have in common? They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
  • What has eight arms and an I.of 60? Four Bills fans watching a football game.
  • How do you keep a Bills fan from masterbating? You paint his dick New Orleans gold and he won't beat it for years!
  • Why shouldn't Bills WR Stevie Johnson tweet to god about dropping a game winning touchdown pass in the overtime game with Pittsburgh? God is a Steelers fan!
  • What is a Buffalo Bills fan's favorite whine? "We can't beat the Patriots!"
  • What's the difference between the Buffalo Bills and a pinball machine? The pinball machine scores more points.
  • Why doesn't Albany have a professional football team? Because then Buffalo would want one.
  • Did you hear about the blonde burglar? He broke into the Buffalo Bills' trophy room.
  • What's the difference between a Buffalo Bill and a dollar bill? A dollar bill is good for four quarters.
  • What do you call a Buffalo Bill in the Super Bowl? A referee.
  • How do you keep a Bills fan from masterbating? You paint his dick Patriots red, white and blue and he won't beat it for 4 years!
  • What's the best way to teach your dog to roll over and play dead? Have him watch a couple Buffalo Bills games.
  • How do the Bills spend the first week of training camp? Studying the Miranda Rights
  • How many Buffalo Bills does it take to change a tire? One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up
  • How do you know the New York State Police are seriously enforcing the Speed Limits into Buffalo. For the first offense, they give you two Buffalo Bills tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them.
  • Why are the New York Jets like Hillary Clinton? Both have Bills to push around.
  • What is th difference between a bucket of shit and an Buffalo Bills fan? The bucket.
  • How many Bills fans does it take to change a light bulb? None they are happy living in New England's shadow!
  • Why did the NFL refuse to punish the Bills Marshawn Lynch for his hit and run accident? Six months with the Buffalo Bills is punishment enough!
  • How did the Buffalo Bills fan die from drinking milk? The cow fell on him!
  • What's the difference between the Bills and cigarettes? Bill Belichick doesn't smoke cigarettes
  • What does a Buffalo Bills fan and a bottle of beer have in common? They're both empty from the neck up.
  • How many Bills fans does it take to change a light bulb? None they are happy living in New England's shadow!
  • What's the difference between Buffalo Bills fans and mosquitoes? Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer.
  • What is a Buffalo Bills fan's favorite whine? "We can't beat New England."
  • Have you hear about the Buffalo Bills new running back? He's the Real McCoy.
  • How do you keep an Buffalo Bills out of your yard? Put up goal posts.
  • How do you casterate an Buffalo Bills fan? Kick his sister in the mouth
  • Why do ducks fly over Ralph Wilson stadium upside down?. There's nothing worth craping on!