Updated: 12/26/01 Click here for Zbonia archive


The words butt crack and butt hole make me giggle. My dad thought I had blood coming from my butt. Christmas is done once again and I am glad honestly. You have to be crazy if you like Christmas more than other holidays like Halloween and New Years. You know who I am talking about. If you would rather spend like a full day or too with family than partying with your friends. This is crazy. Nuts. My grandma is getting really old. And so is everyone. Like even my parents and these other relatives. It is really weird. It really makes me feel like an adult - like I should really try and get my life going. I ain't getting married tomorrow or having kids on Friday, but fuck, I maybe should think about doing these things one day, cause like next time I blink my parents are going to be 70. I am not a big fan of cube talking. Please stop using a signature file.


Email Attachment of the Week

Joke of the Week

I Not Come To Work Today

Carlos calls his boss and says, "Ey, boss I not comework today I really sick.
I got headache, stomach ache and my legs hurt, I not come work."
The boss says: "You know Carlos I really need you today. When I feel like this I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes me feel better and I can go to work.You should try that."

2 hours later Carlos calls: "Boss, I did what you said and I feel great, I be at work soon. You got nice house."

Email Train of the Week - usually have to read these bottom to top


i talked to judy about it outside the fourth floor ovum sausage.
don't worry.

From: AZiola@focal.com

can you take care of this request for me or should i schedule some time
where we can go over this in the lactating spam cans?


don't forget your lunch meeting at twelve in the pork hole.

From: AZiola@focal.com


i forgot i have a meeting at 8AM tomorrow with Mr. Stenbalm at Labia Majora Bacon Bits.


i would name helenjane.com's after pork products.


maybe we could do both together and the email would be like:

marketing meets in fallopian chops at 2:00 pm.

development meeting at uterus roast at 4:00

From: AZiola@focal.com

what would you name helenjane.com's conference rooms after?

i would name andrewziola.com's after organs in the female reproductive system


they all have names like wild west stuff.

ain't that nutty?

From: AZiola@focal.com

"Blazin' Saddles" not Rawhide?

what is this? your conference rooms?


just sent this to the peeps at wells fargo.

From: Yeager, Helen J.

the dreamy meeting i planned for one o'clock today will take place in "Blazin' Saddles" not Rawhide.
apologies, i was drunk. the meeting will end at two with the fire drill.


From: AZiola@focal.com

sent them out today.


i like working on helenjane.com

did you send out xmas cards yet?

From: AZiola@focal.com

andrewziola.com is one of the most important things in my life


that rules.

i have fun making helenjane.com
do you like making the andrewziola.com?

From: AZiola@focal.com

i noticed the helenjane.com i just looked at it

we rule cause we have our own websites


yay zbonia!

did helenjane.com too last night.
made it green for holidays.
thought i'd call in sick today
but forgot the big meeting.

i'm typing up the 'agenda' now.

oh, it's at one, not eleven.
i gots some time.

From: AZiola@focal.com

i was nervous about this work thing this morning too but i am thinkin it is gonna be OK

and today is tuesday which means zbonia


it'll be up tonight.
i feel okay.

got meeting that i'm running at 11.
owe some people some logos.
and i have a bad feeling about them.

From: AZiola@focal.com

looks like she ain't on there


no biggie

you met this girl before, melissa - she coworker of mine

she threw that halloween party when you came to chicago

i feel kinda OK today - i feel pretty good

what up with you?


i thought i uploaded melissa's bio but i guess it didn't work. dang.

how's tuesday?

From: AZiola@focal.com

(See attached file: chc_header_logo.jpg)

wow thanks!


can i make you a mug at artmosphere?
they have super huge ones there.

what would you like on it?

From: AZiola@focal.com

i think i have had at least 4 large mugs

i think my mug has to be at least 24 ounces - maybe actually about 32 ounces


maybe on the silver dollars.

how much coffee you drink today?

From: AZiola@focal.com

i don't know

i haven't looked at them close

my favorite one would be a quarter with some old famous dude flipping the bird

but i doubt they will do that one


those new hampshire quarters sure are wack.
what is your favorite quarter?

From: AZiola@focal.com

not sure what is going on this week = i don't think much

i am back to normal from the cruise but i am now just beat from suckin on the boozes like on the weekend


fun times.
any big plans this week?

still recovering from cruise?

From: AZiola@focal.com

no my work thing is this coming friday

party friday was friend of friend that rented out bar and all ya can drink thing
the party saturday was at friend of a friend's apartment


boss came over and i hit send too fast.

was your work party the one on friday?
or saturday?

i think i have flu.
i'm sicky sick.
working around kids is only for the healthy.

i had 20 4 year old kids this weekend to show how to make a sand candle.
it was crazy.

From: AZiola@focal.com

weekend was pretty fun

party on friday fun

one on satuday wasn't greatest thing ever

fucking bears lost to the packers again

what you do?


thanks rockstar.
how was your weekend?

did your holiday parties rock?

From: AZiola@focal.com

here is pic of Melissa Guskiewicz

(See attached file: melissa.jpg)

Love, Z E-mail me if you have anything you want to post on this page