Hello. Dr. Odd here. I met Tomas at my old job about 4 years ago. He is a really friendly and funny guy and is always smiling and laughing. He moved to California less than a year ago but we still keep in touch. You can drop him a line here. Tomas Yanez

When were you born? Where?

Santa Maria, CA, now famous because of the Michael Jackson trial.

What is the 1st thing you want to do when you get home from work or when you wake up on the weekends?

First think I want to do when I come home from work is hug my kids. The first thing on the weekends is to not hug them, and to go back to sleep!

Who would you like to pattern yourself after?

Some guy who does what he loves, has fun, and makes a lot of money doing it. Public recognition would be nice, too, but not necessary. Someone like Wynton Marsalis, Anton Corbijn, or Pedro Almodovar. Of course, I don’t actually pattern myself after any of those cats, but I’d like to.

What is your favorite vacation spot?

The place I’d most like to return to is the Tuscan countryside, so I guess that must be my favorite.

If you could get paid the same amount of $ at your current job and do anything, what would it be?

Maybe a photographer or a movie director. A writer wouldn’t be so bad either. I’d be a Hunter S. Thompson or Kerouac type. Drunk all the time, alternate levels of consciousness, promiscuous, absinthe, the whole nine. That’d be cool.

If you found $200 in the trash and you had to spend it that day, what would you do with it?

Buy the used set of Titleist 990s I’ve been eyeing Ebay (golf clubs). I might have to look in another trash bin to cover the shipping, though.

What kind of music you like the most and why?

I find myself listening to reggae a lot at work, possibly because the premise, message and rhythm of reggae is so counter to American corporate culture. The irony amuses me. I’m so ironic.

Who have you been most influenced by and why?

Since I grew up with both my folks, they’ve easily had the most impact.

What makes you cry?

I’ve pretty much got the whole male, emotionally repressed thing going on, so I don’t cry. Haven’t done it in years. Not when I got married, not when my kids were born, nothin’. Sure, I might snap one day and launch into a machine gun firing, fatigue-wearing, face-painted rage, but right now - I’m good. I did shed a bit of a tear during Schindler’s List, though.

What is your favorite town or state in the United States?

Stateside, New York City. Nolo contendre. It may be the center of the universe. Outside of the US, Paris is pretty cool; the art, the ‘tude, the vibe. Tre the bomb.

What do you usually eat for dinner?

What? I’ve got no variety? C’mom, Z, we mix it up. My wife cooks dinner almost every night. She’s a euro (dutch). They’re not into fast food like we supersized yanks are. So I’ve got that goin’ for me, which is nice.

What is your favorite website?

ESPN.com. I base the cycles of my life around it.

If you had to hear 1 album for the rest of your life what would it be?

I guess that would be a punishment, right? One album for the rest of your life. I’ll have to go with Sgt. Peppers, Fab Four.

What is your favorite movie?

I don’t have just one, but I’ll say Casablanca, with Bogie telling Bergman, “We’ll always have Paris.” On the Waterfront was pretty dope as well, with a young Brando saying “It was you, Charlie, you was my bruddah. I coulda been a contendah.” The Graduate was pretty funny too. The English Patient was excellent. Elaine’s no movie critic.

What do you do for $?

Trade my creative soul, bit-by-bit, day-by-day, for a few bucks on the grindstone of corporate drudgery. Marx was right. I’m nothin’ but a wage slave. Damn him.

What do you find attractive in the opposite sex?

This reminds me of the joke about the Pope. His handlers inform him that for some ridiculous reason to make the joke work, he has to shag someone. Despite his reservations, he agrees to take one for the team, theologically speaking. The Pope tells his posse that the woman they pick for him must meet three requirements; she’s a virgin, pious, and has a big rack. That kills me. We all want women with all these fantastic qualities, but at the end of the day we want her to be hot too. Is that wrong? That said, I find tall, lean, dark women attractive. Athletic, strong both physically and mentally. I like a sense a humor in a woman, and a bit of perspective doesn’t hurt. And I like a gal with pluck, with moxie, with chutspuh - a girl who’s not afraid to tell you what for. I just don’t like that quality so much in MY wife.

Dogs or cats?

As cool goes, cats are top shelf, but if forced to choose I’ll take the hounds.

What is your favorite sports team?

Yankees. They’ve got the Unit! And with A-Rod working out non-stop since the last out against Boston, they’re gonna win it all.

You got any Tattoos?

Nah, way too cliché.

Do you use styling products in your hair?

Plural? Damn. No, I just use one, a texture cream by American Crew. Chicks dig it.

What is your favorite cartoon character?

Homer Simpson, or Sideshow Bob’s dad.

Got any nick-names? What do they mean or how did you get them?

I don’t have any, at least that people call me to my face.

What is your salad dressing of choice?

Ranch. Yee-haw. And occasionally I’ll go bare back. Whoop!

What is your favorite fast food place? What do you order there?

Zoom Kitchen in Chicago. I used to order the steak sandwich with garlic mayo and roasted peppers when I lived there. Word.

What is your favorite booze beverage?

Red, red wine, preferably large (lots of tannins and fruit) but balanced.

What is the one thing people say about you the most?

I have no idea. He looks like Marc Anthony?

What do you think people say are some of your most virtuous qualities?

I hope people think that I am friendly, and will always give time for them, and if I truly don’t have time I tell them. Which brings me to my next quality – honesty. J I’m not a bullshitter, I’ll tell you straight up what’s going on with me. I think people respond to that openness.

What do you think people say are some of your vices?

I live a pretty clean life, Z, despite my admiration for absinthe drinking, philandering writers. Is golf a vice? My wife would say “hell yes.”

What is your biggest pet peeve?

Liars. I hate liars. Why do people lie? Liars suck.