I was doing some research on the information superhighway about hot peppers and how their heat index is ranked with Scoville units and I got to thinking. There should be a scale for ranking the severity of flatulence stench. To honor the person whose butt stench is the worst I have ever smelled, I am naming this the Hubeny Scale.

Hubeny Rank Description What it feels like
1-10 all sound, no foul smell sitting on a soft couch
11-20 mild disgusting scent, like raw meat that has been in garbage for a day or two scratching a mosquito bite
21-30 smells like a driving through a cow farm stubbing your toe
31-40 smell of toilet after normal movement before you flush paper cut
41-50 best word to describe it is stinky, smell of it makes you visibly moved in a bad way spraining an ankle
51-60 foul smell. smells so bad that you can actually taste it in your mouth a punch in the face
61-70 sour smelling, smells like rotting meat putting a cigarrette out on your skin
71-80 makes your eyes burn and water getting kicked in the testicles
81-90 smell of it actually makes you vomit getting your hand crushed in a clamp
91-100 worst thing you have ever smelled. smell of it makes you physically sick. a week after you smell it, thought of that smell makes you vomit again having your arm cut off sounds better than smellin this