Welcome everyone to the 2005 Mullet Bowling League Banquet

I think it was a good time had by all and I look forward to next year as a member of the Championship Team…the Metal Mullets!

At this time, I would like to recognize each team for all of their Mullitude through the season.

The ANIMULLS took a bit of a dip this year
If you think about why that is, was it the alcohol or the beer?
Maybe it was Dr. Odd throwing his ball in another lane
How can that be…that’s just insane.
Come on everyone, there has to be a reason why they were completely buried
Ah yes….They are all married!

The PORN MULLETS, what a formidable foe
3nd place in the regular season… looked like they had their ducks in a row.
The playoffs started and they had their porn cards
Were they nervous or did they just start playing like retards
I don’t know, but they were run over like a Mack Truck
I am sorry TR, but apparently you are no replacement for Buck.

The MULLETIZZLES, a quiet but deadly team
Their victory over 4-piece almost took them to the top of the cream
You guys had some beers and were a fun team to play
Victory was yours, what else can I say…
Maybe it was Andy’s change in shirt or was it Michelle’s lasting tan
Or was it the fact that Scott could not keep from falling on his can.

The 4 PIECE MCMULLETS, you certainly won your share
It doesn’t take more than Brice’s red face to know that they care
After a tough showing last year Sir assembled a new team
Krauss, Carry and Emily..how could they not gleam
In fact, I would lay a bet on you, if I were in Reno
To bad you lost Brice, at least you were on TEAM MINO.

The MULLETOV COCKTAILS. They are always good
Carving up the lanes like their Mama’s knew they would
After finishing 2nd… they looked prime for a playoff run
Could anything stop them? Would they spoil everyone’s fun?
Then the Divers took you down in a 1st round loss, oh what a shame
I guess you’re just no better than Old Notre Dame.

The MULLET DIVERS…who are these guys?
It seems with subs, they had endless supplies
With Rafe, Rabecca, Jimmy, Jamie and family Guss
You guys were tons of fun and didn’t put up a fuss
In fact, you pulled it together and were not a disgrace
However, I have to ask, how the hell did you end up in 3rd place?

The MULLETINIS, our regular season champ
On everyone else’s balls, it seemed they had a clamp
Just having Sheri, and Jon’s forearms might have been enough
But once you add the Haslett’s…that team is really tough
Your team was fun, jammed some mullet tunes and overall was filled with pride
But, as they say, always the bridesmaid…never the bride.

The METAL MULLETS we did it with style and class
Only one thing to say…We beat all your ass!

Thanks to everyone for such a great season….. and a special thanks to Z and Melissa for all of their efforts.