Things That Suck About Getting Old

Hair on back
Hair in ears
Your young coworkers don't know what 90210 is
You work with people that don't remember the 1985 bears superbowl
You visit your college and the students look like your kids
You talk about how things were back in the day
You take vitamins
You spend time working in the garage
You remember the 1st time people wore their collars up
You recognize elevator music songs
You like staying in
You know what rabbit ears are
You know what a pension plan is
You have never heard of the drinking games people are playing
You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.
You have a cabinet for pills
You get pulled over by the police for going too slow
You find yourself watching CBS and VH1
You feel hungover but you didn't drink the night before
You feel body parts bouncing when you go down stairs
You eat more chicken because you are worried about red meat and heart disease
You don't know how to program the VCR
You constantly talk about the price of gasoline.
You can't see your feet
You can't believe how fast the kids are driving
You are proud of your lawn mower.
You add weight to your drivers license weight every time you go to the DMV
Your last experience with video games was Atari or even Nintendo
Very tired in morning if you stay up late
There's nothing left to learn the hard way.
The only exercise you do is for rehab purposes.
The kinds of things that you want in a car is for it to be roomy and good gas mileage
Strangers call you Sir
People call at 9 PM and ask, "Did I wake you?"
Not being able to hit on hot dumb 24 year olds
Men get bigger gut
Knees hurt
Joints hurt
It takes twice as long to look half as good.
Inability to drink heavily without feeling like a sack of hammers the next day
Inability to commit to anything like softball because you have to go shopping with your wife for a couch
I want clothes for xmas and not toys.
I think concerts are loud
I think bars are smokey
I go to bed early
Get offended by Hooters ads
I don't care how my hair looks
I can't go into Abercrombie & Fitch
Hurts when I bend over to tie shoes
Hearing goes bad
Having to worry about your job because you work in telecom
Have more money but don't buy fun stuff with it
Getting lucky has nothing to do with girls, it has all to do with Keno
Feces smell worse
Exercise feels good afterwards
Erectile dysfunction
Cold weather (winters) bother you more
Cannot eat spicy food because it makes stomach upset
You sound like an idiot when you say words like cool, rad, and dude