Family Guy Fun

He's Too Sexy for His Fat

---Scene One---
<Inside Grocery Store>
Lois: "Oh my, tomato's at 3.99 a pound, that's so high, isn't that high, it seems so high."
Stewie: "Ah, this is interminable! I demand to know why you insist on taking me everywhere you go. I mean, really, what could possibly happen, if you left me home by myself."
<At Griffin' house>
<Fire Lights>
Jimmy Kahn: "Great party Griff'."
Stewie: "Girls, you know Jimmy Kahn. Jimmy make your self at home."
Jimmy: "Thanks."
<Jimmy punches a girl>
Stewie: "I meant have a cheese doodle, but, whatever it's a party!"
<Back at Store>
Lois: "Instant stuffing or instant mashed potatoes? The choices are…"
<Crash. Wine isle, Peter, standing around the broken glass and wine on floor.>
Peter: "Cleanup Isle 3!"
Peter: "I got it!"
Lois: "Peter, where's Chris?"
Chris: "Heh. I love you She Hulk."
<Enter Security Guard>
Security Guard: "All right son, we're gonna need those two hams back."
Chris: "Huh? I don't have any hams."
Guard: "Lift up your shirt, son."
Chris: "I need an Adult. I need an Adult!"
Guard: "You're not a shoplifter, you're just a fat kid. Sorry about that fatty fat fatty. Hey Tom he's just a fat kid! Aren't you fatty. Your just a big ol' fat kid. here's some chocolate fatso."
Chris: "Thanks."
<Meg and Brian looking at flee collars.>
Meg: "Hey, Brian, flea collars are on sale."
Brian: "Nah, too many chemicals, this year I'm going to try a more natural alternative."
<Inside an Acupuncture Doctors Office>
Brian: "Ahh, Hah, ahh. Sorry doctor Lang, I guess I'm nervous. This whole thing's a little weird."
Doctor With Irish Accent: "Ah never you fear, lade book, I've been doing this all me life. You see, the reason your fleas are drawn to ya, is your kidney energy is being blocked by a dark Chi. Or what we call in my country, 'we fung chow hu'.
Brian: "Hey, Doc. Do you have to keep those two boxes right next to each other."
Doc: "Why what do they say?"
Brian: "I think were through here!"
<Cut to Title Theme, All singing, except Brian, he only speaks the words.>
Lois: "Its seems today, that all you see, is violence in movies, and sex on TV"
Peter: "But where are those good old fashioned values."
All: "On which we used to rely. Lucky theirs a family guy. Lucky theirs a man who, positively can do, all the things that make us,"
Stewie: "Laugh and Cry."
All: "He's A Family Guy!"
---Scene Two---
<Dream State, all the worlds leaders are sitting in a briefing room, Stewie's face comes on a big screen in the front of the room.>
Stewie: "Attention world leaders, I have 137 nuclear warheads trained on every capital city around the globe! The world is now under my control, but oh no, I'm naked."
World Leaders: Laughing
<Out of dream, and in Stewie's room.>
Stewie: "Huh, What the duce? Ahhh, Fleas, Ahhh."
<Stewie runs out of his room, and down the hall, and slides, and crashes into a table with a lamp on it.>
Stewie: "Damn you Mop&Glow!"
<Stewie enters parent's room.>
Stewie: "Wake up le owner. This decrepit Hoover-vile is infested with something besides idiots!"
Lois: "Oh my gosh, Stewie you've got bugs on your 'jammies. Peter wake up!"
Peter: Mumbles
Lois: "Stewie's covered with fleas!"
Peter: "Oh that's nothing, once, when I was a kid, I was covered with Ticks!"
Lois: "Peter it's not a contest!"
Peter: "Well it was back then!"
Lois: "(Gasp), Oh no, Brian!"
Stewie: "That's it, time for doggie to go the way of Old Yeller!"
<In a run down cabin.>
Lady: "Old Yeller, did I get a call from Tony?"
Old Yeller: "Oh yeah, he left a message I forgot to tell you."
Lady: "Is it on the machine?"
Old Yeller: "(Gasp), I erased it."
Lady: "(sigh), Alright" <Cocks Gun> "Out back."
Kid: "No ma', yeller's my dog, I'll do it…"
Yeller: "Come on, He'll call back! <Muffled Grunts>"
<Bathroom, Brian trying to do something about the fleas. Door opens, Enter Lois, Peter, And Stewie.>
Lois: "Brian are you okay?"
Brian: "Okay? Ha, ha, Okay?, I'm covered in fleas lady, I'm losing it here!"
Peter: "Get a hold of yourself."
<Peter slaps Lois>
Lois: "Owwww!, Peter your supposed hit Brian!"
<Enter Chris>
Chris: "Dad, I'm itchy. I'm itchy!"
<Enter Meg>
Meg: "Out of my way wide load! Mom, there's fleas all over the house!"
Peter: "There's only one thing to do! Learn the language of the fleas, earn their trust, then breed with their women! And in time our differences will be forgotten!"
Lois: "Call, the damn Exterminator!"
---Scene Three---
<Inside the exterminator building.>
(Alarms Blaring, Ominous Music)
Exterminator1: "We got a 602 a 31 Spooner Street!"
(Guns Cock)
Exterminator2: "Logan let's go!"
Logan: "I can't, I just can't"
Exterminator1: "What's with you Logan, you look like hell!"
Exterminator2: "Flarity, he just watched his wife and kid get carried away by 7 million fire ants! I don't want to meet the man who looks good after that!"
<The exterminators drive to the house. Kicks in door.>
Exterminator2: "My god!, Their everywhere!"
(Guns Fire) "Yaaaaa!"
(Guns Fire, Everything shatters, or breaks)
(Grenade pin is pulled, and thrown, Explosion!)
Exterminator: "They're in the carpet!"
Exterminator: "Got one over here!"
Exterminator: "Its no good there's too many of them!"
(Guns are thrown at the fleas.)
Exterminator: "What do we do now?, What the Hell do we do now!"
Exterminator: "We pray."
(One shot is fired)
Exterminator: "Logan!, you son of a bitch!"
Logan: "You think I'd miss this party?"
<Griffins rummage through the mess>
Brian: "I feel terrible about this whole thing, look why don't I put us up in a nice hotel for a couple of days?"
Lois: "(Gasp), that's a great idea Brian, it'll be like a little vacation!"
Peter: "You might want to bring some cash with you, cause you know some places don't take credit cards!"
<Midday street, girl selling lemon-aide.>
Girl: "But mister I need real money, I can't take a credit card."
Peter: "Oh I see, cash only, eh, no paper trail, what are you selling? Reaper, crack, smack, horse, ex, shrooms, dust, meth? In my neighborhood, I don't think so!"
<Peter knocks down the stand. Girl cries and runs away.>
<Door opens, Enter Griffins.>
Lois: "Oh my what a lovely room, (gasp) and its so clean."
Stewie: "Yeah I think the ultra violet scanning light will be the judge of that! I picked this up on dateline, from, that yummy exoskeleton, Maria Shriver."
<Scans the room>
Stewie: "Mmmhhhmmm, just as I though, oatmeal, spittle, seamen! Oh this must be where Wilfered Brimley was strangled by Bob Crane!"
---Scene Four---
<Pool area of the hotel.>
<Jumps and Splashes.>
Lois: "Jump in honey. Don't be afraid, the turtle will keep you safe!"
Stewie: "Oh for god's sake, I'm to intrust my life to a turtle, natures 'D' student?"
<Stewie gets pushed in.>
Stewie: (Gasp) <Swims under water, while plastic turtle pulls him back up.> (Cough, Cough) "By all, this is marvelous, I feel like a young Johnny Wiesmuller.'
<Peter and Chris>
Peter: "Hey, Chris aren't you coming in?"
Chris: "Uh, Can I swim with my shirt on?"
Peter: "No, you can't swim with your shirt on, wait a second, what are you hiding under your shirt. Do you have bruises, did somebody hit you? Lois what did you to my son?"
Lois: "Will you keep your voice down? You're embarrassing him!"
Peter: "What are you talking about, if I wanted to embarrass him, I'd do something like this. Hey, hey everybody, hey look what Chris Griffins father, Peter Griffin's doing!"
<Sucks his own nipple.>
Everybody: "Ewwwww…"
Lois: "Stop it! Chris why don't you want to take your shirt off?"
Chris: "Uh, Cause I'm fat."
Lois: "Oh, honey, no one thinks your fat."
<Enter Pool life guard>
LifeGuard: "I'm sorry sir you can't park your van on the diving board."
Lois: "This is my son!"
LifeGuard: "Oh, My apologies, Hey Tom! He's not a van, he's just a fat kid!"
Peter: "Don't listen to him Chris, I'm going to get you a soda, you wait here."
<Exit Peter>
<Enter Peter with The Club, Peter sticks The Club on Chris>
<Exit Peter>
---Scene Five---
<Stewie in pool with plastic turtle floatie>
Stewie: "I say, hello, you there, I'm ready to get out, somebody. Oh my what was that?"
<Bubbles start>
Stewie: "Oh hello Mr. Water Jet!"
<Enter Meg>
Meg: "Stewie are you ready…"
Stewie: "Go away!"
<Peter and Chris>
Peter: "Your not fat Chris, you just come from a long line of husky Griffins, like your great, great, great uncle, Jabba Da Griffin."
<Jabba Da Griffin, and a female. In a Jabba the hut from star wars room.>
Jaba: "Raja, naba do wa, gola wookie, nipple pinchie?"
<At pool, Peter, Lois, Chris>
Lois: "Honey, if you want to lose weight, I'll put you on a diet, and your father can help you exercise!"
Chris: "Really?"
<Enter Meg>
Meg: "Why don't you do what the super models do, stick your fingers down your throat, and throw up until your skinny!"
Peter: "Chris, don't listen to your sister, sticking your finger down your throat doesn't make you throw up!"
<Slowly peter puts his finger in his mouth.>
<Throws up, but holds it in his mouth.>
Lois: "Peter are you okay?"
---Scene Six---
<Griffin's sitting at the table ready to eat dinner.>
Lois: "Meatloaf for us, and a very special, very delicious, steamed vegetable dish for Chris."
Chris: "Oh, I hate vegetables."
Lois: "Honey their good for you."
Chris: "Tastes like a monkey, a monkey that's past its prime."
Stewie: "Mmm, this meat loaf is a symphony of flavor, it's too bad you can't have some, it's practically orgasmic. Oh Yes, Yes, Oh, Yes, Yes !"
Brian: "I'll have what he's having."
---Scene Seven---
<In a gym, Peter and Chris.>
Peter: "Okay Chris time for some good old fashioned exercise. Like those guys are doing!"
<Two muscle guys lifting 2-ton triangular weights.>
MuscleGuy; "I say Fididous, great day to be doing squat thrusts and lifting our huge triangular Iron weights."
Both: "Hup, hyup, hup, hop, hup."
Chris: "Dad I don't like running, the sound of my thighs scraping together hurts my ears."
<Puts a Twinkie on a stick and string, on a little thing to go around a head, and puts it on Chris' head.>
Chris: "Hey, a Twinkie, ha ha ha ha, I'm gonna get you!"
<Starts running>
<Outside Chris on a chin up bar>
Peter: "C'mon, you can do it, feel the burn Chris, feel the burn."
<Peter Lights a fire underneath Chris>
---Scene Eight---
<At a stream, Chris swimming with the fish.>
Peter: "Thata' boy, all the way up stream buddy!"
<Chris swims like the fish. A Bear caches Chris.>
Chris: Screams
Peter: "Ok, Okay, Just relax, try to soil yourself like we practiced."
---Scene Nine---
<Inside Bathroom, Chris weighing himself. Peter watching.>
Chris: "Dad, this says I gained weight!"
Peter: "That's impossible, take off your shirt!"
<Something sticks out of Chris>
Peter: "What the hell is that?"
Chris' Body: Plop!
<Stewie rolls out and onto the floor.>
Stewie: Caching his breath. "Oh, (Gasp), Bovine Lummox! Uhh. (Gasp), Oh God!"
---Scene Ten---
<Cleveland's Restaurant.>
Peter: "I'll tell you Cleveland, he's been working out all week, and he hasn't lost a pound!"
Cleveland: "Peter if this desperate about Chris' weight, why don't you just suck the fat out."
Peter: "Look if you could find a hole on the boy, do you want to put your lips on, be my guest!"
Cleveland: "I'm talking about Liposuction! By brother, Brodricks' a cosmetics surgeon."
Peter: "Is, Is He good?"
Cleveland: "Well, Nell Carter twice as big before Brodrick got through with her! FYI, He used the fat he took out of her to make the two kids from good burger!"
---Scene Eleven---
<Inside Brodrick's Office>
Brodrick: "This is a very safe procedure, son, you wont feel a thing! I'm like a Green Beret, you know, I sneak inside you, and a skulk around, like its Vietnam or something, an', and I'm sneaking through the bush, you know, and I get all the fat, like the fats' my buddies, stuck behind enemy lines, or something, you know, and when I got all my buddies, I sneak out again. I'm very mysterious when I'm inside you, you know, like a, uh, like the wind, you know."
---Scene Twelve---
<Back home in the kitchen, Lois and Stewie. Stewie sitting at his chair, with a plate that is mostly clean.>
Lois: "Oh, good boy, Stewie, Clean Plate! Although I think, you got…"
Stewie: "Yes, yes, yes, I got more of on me than in me, yes that never gets old Lois."
Lois: "Here's your desert sweetie, dig in!"
<Lois handing Stewie a plate with a slice of chocolate cake.>
Stewie: "I'll eat it when I'm ready!"
<Enter Chris>
Chris: "Hi!"
Stewie: "I'm ready! Well, time for desert isn't it? Well lets see, big chocolate cake for Stewie, and we have some, very tasty for, big fat you! Bon appetite!"
< Stewie takes a leaf off the plant in the middle of the table and hands it to Chris.>
Stewie: "Oh and feel free to use my fork, I shan't be needing it. Watch me! That's it, Watch this!"
<Stewie stuffs the whole piece of cake in his mouth, or at least around his mouth.>
Lois: "Oh Stewie, stop eating like a little piggy! Maybe we should cut down on your sweets, you're starting to get a little Buddha Belly! Chris where have you been."
<Lois dumping the empty plate in the sink.>
Chris: "Dad took me to a doctor to get the fat vacuumed out of my belly.>
Lois: "What!?"
Chris: "I didn't do it, I'm just gonna stay on my diet and exercise!"
Lois: "Good for you, that was a very grown up decision! I mean what kind of lazy narcissistic irresponsible moron would even consider doing as unbelievably foolish as getting Liposuction! Who I ask you, Who?!"
<Enter Peter>
Peter: "Hello!"
---Scene Thirteen---
<Inside Kitchen, Lois, Stewie, Peter, Chris, Meg, and Brian.>
Lois: Mumbles
Stewie: "Oh my god, it's finally happened, he's become so massive he collapsed into himself, like a neutron star!"
Meg: "Mom! Can I get Lipo too?"
Lois: "Forget it Meg! Peter, you can't just suck 200 pounds of fat out of yourself, its not natural!"
Peter: "C'mon Lois, I feel great dropping kind of weight all at once, you remember how you felt after you had Chris?"
---Scene Fourteen---
<Outside playground, Lois and Stewie. Stewie on a bouncy horsy.>
Lois: "And, they're off!"
<Horse just limbers to the ground, with the weight of Stewie.>
Stewie: "Well then, Giddieyup!"
<Chris Laughing. View is on Peter and Brian sitting on a bench. Brian holding a news paper.>
Peter: "Great to be thin!"
Brian: "Yup."
Peter: "You know, uh, there's something I always wanted to do, Brian, but I could never do it cause I was so heavy. But you know; now, now that I don't weight so much, I think I can! Could ya, Could you help me do it Brian?"
Brian: "Sure, Peter I'd be honored."
Peter: "Well, I was wondering if I could put a little saddle on your back and ride you like a horsy?"
<Brian ignoring Peter.>
Peter: "Oh, oh, Okay! No I understand, it's too much, its okay."
<Peter leaves, for a while.>
Brian: "You know I like Hillary Clinton I don't care what any one says..."
<Peter comes back quickly jumping on Brian.>
Brian: "Ahh Peter, What it is it?"
Peter: "Yahh. Yahh. C'mon old paint"
Brian: "Ow, there are bones in you ass! C'mon, C'mon."
---Scene Fifteen---
<Pool. Peter.>
Peter: "I see you, he he he he."
<Inside house, Lois, Meg.>
Meg: "…but mom, it could change my life."
Lois: "Meg, for the last time, your getting plastic surgery."
Meg: "Why not? It's totally safe, a lot of famous people have done it!"
<Antarctica, a lot of Eskimo people.>
Eskimo1: "My son, your place is here in the Ice Village, you know nothing of Hollywood and its way's!"
Eskimo2: "But father, I have dreams and courage, and the name of an excellent cosmetic surgeon. Fear not! Someday word will reach you about the successes of, me, the great Eskimo actor, Jennifer Love Hewitt! "
<JLH leaves on a boat. Other Eskimos talk all at once."
Eskimos: "Make me proud."
Eskimos: "Bring pride to our village."
Eskimos: "Have fun, enjoy your self."
Eskimos: "Send fire wood!"
<Back in the Kitchen. Enter Peter.>
Peter: "She's right Lois, plastic surgery is great! I was thinking of having Brodrick take a look at my nose."
Lois: "It doesn't matter if your nose is a little bulbubsy, or your eyes are too close together, or your chest is flabby. You are who you are!"
Peter: "I think I know what you're getting at."
---Scene Sixteen---
<Inside House Lois, Brian, Chris, Meg.>
<Enter Some Guy>
Some Guy: "Knock, knock." <Sounds like peter>
Brian: "Hey pal, you can't just walk in here withou… Holy crap its peter!"
Chris: "Dad, your pretty, like a girl!"
Meg: "You look like a totally different person!"
Lois: "Oh this is crazy, you walk in here with your chisel jaw, and your, oh my! Uh, I liked you the way you were! Your not even real anymore, you, Peter did you get a new buttox?"
Peter: "I had to, my old one had a crack in it! He, he, he, he."
Lois: "Well, I couldn't be more angry with you, oh!" <Drooling like "ah".>
Lois: "You, you really let this family down, we should be embracing the things god gave us! Not telling our kids that a person is not as good someone else, because of the way they look."
<Lois Runs and jumps on peter>
Peter: "Ah, holy crap."
<Some how Stewie rolls out into the trash cans, and gets stuck in one.>
<Enter Fidious and Barnabey.>
Barnabey: "Look there's a baby in that refuse bin!"
Fidious: "Not to close barnabey, if you touch it the mother won't take it back!"
Fidious: "Aleoup!"
<Fidious jumps on Barnabey's arms and onto a big front wheel bike. Old fashioned bike. And Ride away.>
---Scene Seventeen---
<Inside grocery store, peter standing in a long line. Enter Warren Fredricks.>
Warren: "Excuse me sir, what is a hansom man, like you, waiting in line?"
Peter: "I need an adult, I need an adult!"
Warren: (Chuckles) "Warren Fredricks, Quahog Beautiful People's Club. C'mon in front!"
Peter: "But, all, all those people were in front of me!"
Warren: "You haven't been beautiful very long have you? Gorgeous guys like us don't have to wait in line, haven't you noticed, people will do anything for a beautiful person!"
Peter: "Yeah, you know, come to think of it!"
<Enter Dream State.>
<Peter opens door, a hot chick stands in the doorway. >
H. Chick "Hi, I'm on a scavenger hunt, and I need a human foot?"
Peter: "Well, As a rule I would say no, but okay come in."
<Brings Chick in, and sits down, rolls up his pant leg, and picks up his saw, and starts cutting. >
Peter: "So, uh, this is what this is like for a school project or, ah, aghhhhhh!"
<Exit Dream State. >
BagLady: "Raoul Please take this hansom gentlemen's bags to his car."
<Raoul runs up and takes peters bags. >
Peter: "Thank you."
<Peter and Warren walk out of the store. Walks on a black mat. Door's open. >
Peter: "Hey, when your beautiful, door magically open for you."
Warren: "Actually, it opened because you stepped on that black rubber square. Of course if that wasn't there, it would have opened anyway, because your beautiful!"
Peter: "Wow!"
---Scene Eighteen---
<Inside a nice building, with a lot of beautiful people. Peter and Warren walk in. >
Peter: "Hey, there's a lot of good looking people here."
Warren: "Of Course, this is the Quahog Beautiful People's Club, and you're our newest member. Here's your introductory basket, its got some scented lotions, Ferrari Sun Glasses, and of course, some pills to make your bowel movements smell like bakery fresh cinnamon rolls."
---Scene Nineteen---
<Back at hotel room. Stewie sitting in high chair, with Brian sitting on the floor. .
Stewie: "Ah, Damn-It!"
Brian: "Oh what happened, Orson fall down?"
Stewie: "Shut up, I, I don't want to hear it!"
Brian: "Well, serves you right, you spent all that time trying to make Chris jealous, and now you have an eating disorder!"
Stewie: "Just, Help me up."
Brian: "You know I would, but my doctor advised me against heavy lifting!"
Stewie: "Oh, Har, Di, Har, Har."
<Brian starts to spin Stewie.>
Stewie: "What, What the devil are you doing?"
<Spinning faster>
Stewie: "Stop it, Stop it, I'm getting dizzy!"
Stewie: "Ah, Blast!"
---Scene Twenty---
<Living room, Peter, Lois>
Lois: "Peter, did you paste a new picture of your self, on our wedding portrait?"
Peter: "Yeah, I think it looks better."
Lois: "You pasted it over me!"
Peter: "Yeah, I think it looks better."
Lois: (Gasp) "Have you lost your mind?"
Peter: "Well, somebody's jealous!"
Lois: "Peter, have you forgotten about Chris? He need's you to help him exercise."
Brian: "Yeah, he finally figured out how to catch the Twinkie!"
<Chris leans back, and takes the Twinkie off the string. >
Chris: "Ha, ha, I'm turning you into Pooh!"
Peter: "Well, I'm going to the beautiful people's club. I guess I can him with me. Hell, seeing us all in one place, might give something to shoot for."
Lois: "The Beautiful People's club, ha, how, how come I've never heard of that?"
Peter: "Lois, I can't say anymore. I'm probably already in trouble for mentioning to, a, uh, well, we, call you Normies. Okay bye!
<Lois follows peter out the door, Brian follows Lois.>
Brian: "Are you going to take that?"
<No answer>
Brian: "LOIS!"
Lois: "What, oh Brian, I was, was, just, seeing, if the, driveway"
Brian: "That wasn't even a sentence! You were hoggling peter like horny school girl!"
Lois: "Oh, I can't help it! I know, I know, he's become a superficial, ego maniacal, jerk, but, I've never been more attracted to him! Oh, does that make me a bad person?"
Brian: "Yes, Yes it does make you a bad person!"
---Scene Twenty-one---
<In front of the BPC.>
Warren: "Peter good to see you, come with me I've got a lot of tall statuesque people I want you to meet. What's that?"
Peter: "That's my son Chris!"
Warren: "He can't come in, (Scoffs), he's fat!"
Peter: "Well, let me tell you something buddy, if my son can't come in, then I'll just come in!"
<To Chris>
Peter: "See ya at home."
Chris: "But dad?"
Peter: "Trust me Chris, sometimes its better not to fit in!"
<Cut to dreamish-memory-thingy. A dark field with, a lot of guys in B.D.U.s (Battle Dress Uniforms), Except for peter, in a clown costume.>
Peter: "You're all stupid, see their gonna be looking for army guys!"
---Scene Twenty-two---
<Back at the hotel. Enter Chris>
Chris: "Don't look at me! I'm hideous!"
Lois: "Peter, how could you treat Chris that way, you know he's self conscious about his weight!"
Peter: "What are you mad at me for? After all he gets his fat from your jeans. Which by the way I'm wearing!"
Lois: "Oh, I hate what you've become! Why don't you back to that doctor and have him suck the fat out of your head!"
Peter: "Maybe I will! And then I'll put it on my feet, and skate on Paul bunion giant skillet, to cook his flapjacks!"
Lois: "That doesn't make any sense!"
Peter: "It doesn't have to, I'm beautiful!"
Chris: "You're not welcome here, go away!"
<Enter Meg>
Meg: "Wow, Chris, did you lose weight?"
Chris: "Uh maybe, I've been working out."
Meg: "Well, you look wicked skinny, I'm like jealous!"
Chris: "Thanks Meg, I'm jealous of your mustache!"
Meg: "I don't have a mustache, do I?"
Lois: "oh hunny, its fine, it makes you look distinguished."
Meg: "But mom!"
Lois: "Now Meg I think all my children are beautiful."
<Outside Stewie is siting on the steps, trying to eat ice cream. >
Stewie: "Damn you, ice cream, come to my mouth. How dare you disobey me!"
<A mother and young child in a stroller walk by.>
Stewie: "What are you looking at, you infantile, stupid, that's right, damn you and such. You can go (yawning) burn in hell."
<Stewie falls asleep.>
---Scene twenty-three---
<Peter driving in his car down the street.>
Peter: "She is so jealous, of course I'm beautiful, I mean look at me."
<Peter looks at himself in the rearview mirror.>
Peter: "Oh, how strange must watch road, can't look away, too beautiful!"
<Still looking in the mirror.>
<Car drives off the road and Peter falls out of the car, and rolls down a cliff. Then rolls into a fat factory and a working whistle blows. Peter is in a vat of fat, and starts drinking, and the level of fat lowers, twice.>
<Now in a hospital. Doctor and Peter, and Lois and the Kids>
Doctor: "Well mister griffin the bandages are ready to come off, but I think I should tell you, it's a miracle that your alive at all, we did all we can, but medical science has come just so far."
<Takes off the bandages, a horrific face is left.>
Kids: (Gasp)
Lois: "Oh, Peter you look like you!"
Peter: "I can't believe your all standing by my side after what a jerk I was, especially to you! I'm sorry Chris."
Chris: "That's okay dad!"
Lois: "Well Peter I guess you learned a pretty valuable lesson."
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