Z-Bonia

Updated: 11/6/01 Click here for Zbonia archive

Words

I never can remember dreams like ever never. But I have been having some weird ones that I can kinda actually remember. They are like exciting little adventures. Like a group of people and myself are on these dangerous missions. They were really weird and really exciting. They were more entertaining than Boston Public and Boston Public is entertaining. Speak up I can't hear you. They said it was going to be warmer today and here I am in my short sleeve shirt and I am cold. I am a member of the I Love Olives Club. I worked at the Olive Garden for a Summer when I was younger. My favorite job was at the Dairy Queen. I wish I had a soft serve ice cream machine at my cubicle. I have never face painted for a sporting event. Looks like it ain't going to be warm anymore so I have to wear shirts. This sucks. My cat likes to pee off the edge of her litter box. I don't pee off of the edge of the toilet.

 

Email Attachment of the Week

Joke of the Week

Three men are sitting naked in the sauna.

Suddenly there is a beeping sound. The first man presses his forearm and the beeping stops. The others look at him questioningly. "That's my pager," he says. "I have a microchip under the skin of my arm."

A few minutes later a phone rings. The second man lifts his palm to his ear. When he finishes he explains, "That's my mobile phone. I have a microchip in my hand."

The third man, feeling decidedly low-tech, steps out of the sauna. In a few minutes he returns with a piece of toilet paper extending from his rear end.

The others raise their eyebrows.

"I'm getting a Fax," he explains.

Email Train of the Week - usually have to read these bottom to top

yeagerhj@WellsFargo.COM

"Baked on Caked on", (8 p.m., WB)
Tensions come to a head when Z discovers Schmoopie pooped in the oven.
Part 1 of 2.

AZiola@focal.com

"you're fat and you stole my breadcrumbs", (8 p.m., WB)
Helen confronts the fat woman in the hallway when there weren't enough
breadcrumbs to cover the cauliflower.

yeagerhj@WellsFargo.COM

"you're sticky or you chafe", (8 p.m., WB)
Z runs into pubic woes when a band aid will not cover his privates.

AZiola@focal.com

"Your Money or Your Wife", (8 p.m., WB)

Felicity runs into money woes when financial aid will not cover her tuition.

yeagerhj@WellsFargo.COM

in Z's Urethra (8 p.m., WB) Z discovers Pacey's whereabouts (and his boat) in his pee-hole and Helen reconsiders her choice of wearing panties that said friday on them when it is actually wednesday.

AZiola@focal.com

In Helen's Cooch (9 p.m., WB), Helen discovers Pacey's whereabouts (in her private part) and Z Dawg reconsiders his choice of buying yellow mustard and not the dijon shit.

yeagerhj@WellsFargo.COM

on Z's crack (9 p.m., Chicago, IL), Z discovers Paceys's whereabouts in his crack and Helen reconsiders her choice for dinner.

AZiola@focal.com

i am looking forward to this

yeagerhj@WellsFargo.COM

On Dawson's Creek (8 p.m., WB), Joey discovers Pacey's whereabouts and Dawson reconsiders his choice of college.

AZiola@focal.com

some trippy stuff

Love, Z E-mail me if you have anything you want to post on this page