Z-Bonia

Updated: 10/22/02 Click here for Zbonia archive

Words

Here is how I my nickname Z. I was in grade school playing basketball and the guy that announced the players said "#22 The Z Man, Andrew Ziola." Ever since then I have been Z. I think more people call me Z than my real name, Andrew. I wonder how the world would be if there was free candy all over the place. I went to Windor, Canada and Detroit this weekend. Windor was pretty OK - not shady at all. And Detroit wasn't as crappy as everyone says. It was pretty OK. The Bears lost the football game and this really sucks and Lions fans were mocking us saying like Chicago sucks and go back to Chicago and we were like - Chicago doesn't suck and fine - we'll go back to Chicago.

Ever wonder where the word SHIT comes from? Well, here it is: Certain types of manure used to be transported (as everything was years ago) by ship.

In dry form it weighed a lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began again, of which a by-product is methane gas.

As the stuff was stored below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at night with a lantern, BOOOOM!

Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was discovered what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always stamped with the term "S.H.I.T" on them, which meant to the sailors to "Ship High In Transit."

In other words, high enough off the lower decks so that any water that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start the production of methane.

Email Attachment of the Week

Joke of the Week

During an hour's swimming at a municipal pool you will ingest 1/12 liter of urine.

In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with 15 penises (touching door handles etc.)

An average person's yearly fast food intake will contain 12 pubic hairs.

In a year you will have swallowed 14 insects - while you slept!

Annually you will shake hands with 11 women who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

Annually you will shake hands with 6 men who have recently masturbated and failed to wash their hands.

In a lifetime 22 workmen will have examined the contents of your dirty linen basket.

At an average wedding reception you have a 1/100 chance of getting a cold sore from one of the guests.

Daily you will breath in 1 liter of other peoples' anal gases.

Email Train of the Week - usually have to read these bottom to top

Shin

can we add at the bottom, "for any additional information, please
contact korea."

Andrew P Ziola

Attn. Building Management:

Shin has wee wee and poo poo problems in building of yours. please
lower toilet.

Shin

oh, yeah, I bet those are universal.

Andrew P Ziola

what about wee wee and poo poo?

Shin

I don't think so.

Andrew P Ziola

are poo and pee like universal words that people in any launguage understand?

Shin

good idea. I think they may have a language problem though.

Andrew P Ziola

maybe you can have korea contact the building and tell them whats up

"RoMaN"

i stand.

From: <jshin@focal.com>

I can't squat over it either b/c I'm to short too.

In korea, the public bathrooms are all on the ground and you just
squat over them.

"RoMaN"

maybe you could buy a little kid shitter from here:

http://www.thepottystore.com/

"RoMaN"

no report that the pisser needs to be lowered.

From: <jshin@focal.com>

report that I am short? I'm pretty sure everyone knows that.

"RoMaN"

should we call and report this?

From: <jshin@focal.com>

When I use the handicap stall in the bathroom, I am so short that
my legs just hang when I'm sitting on the toilet. My feet don't touch
the ground.

Love, Z E-mail me if you have anything you want to post on this page