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Denver Broncos Jokes  

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  • What does a Denver Broncos fan do when his team has won the Super Bowl? He turns off the PlayStation
  • How do you keep a Broncos fan from masterbating? You paint his dick Chargers blue and he won't beat it for years!
  • How many Broncos fans does it take to change a light bulb? None they are happy living in Seattle's shadow!
  • Why are the Broncos like grizzly bears? Every fall they go into hibernation.
  • What's the best way to teach your dog to roll over and play dead? Have him watch a couple Denver Broncos games.
  • What's Peyton Mannings favorite TV show? Duck Dynasty.
  • How do you keep a Denver Bronco out of your yard? Put up goal posts.
  • How do you casterate an Denver Broncos fan? Kick his sister in the mouth.
  • Where do you go in Denver in case of a tornado? INVESCO Field they never get a touchdown there!
  • Why are Denver Broncos jokes getting dumber and dumber? ? Because Broncos fans have started to make them up themselves.
  • What's the difference between Denver Broncos fans and mosquitoes? Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer.
  • What do you call a season worth of Peyton Manning game tapes? Duck Dynasty.
  • What's the difference between the Broncos and cigarettes? Russell Wilson doesn't smoke cigarettes
  • What do the Denver Broncos and a Chick-Fil-A manager have in common? Neither one shows up for work on Sunday.
  • What's the difference between the Denver Broncos and the Taliban? The Taliban has a running game!
  • What does a Denver Broncos fan and a bottle of beer have in common? They're both empty from the neck up.
  • How do the Chargers spend the first week of training camp? Studying the Miranda Rights
  • What do the Denver Broncos and Billy Graham have in common? They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
  • Why do the Denver Broncos fail their drug tests? Because they are always a mile HIGH.
  • Richard Sherman might have grown up in Compton but Peyton Manning has been through 2 World Wars, 20 Presidents, and is a genuine fossil.
  • How many Denver Broncos does it take to change a tire? One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up
  • Why are so many Denver Broncos players claiming they have the Swine Flu? So They don't have to touch the pigskin!
  • Want to hear a Broncos Super Bowl joke? Demaryius Thomas!
  • How did the Denver Broncos fan die from drinking milk? The cow fell on him!
  • What's the difference between the Denver Broncos & the Taliban? The Taliban has a running game!
  • Why do the Denver Broncos want to change their name to the Denver Tampons? Because they are only good for one period and do not have a second string!
  • What do the Denver Broncos and possums have in common? Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
  • Did you hear that Denvers's football team doesn't have a website? They can't string three "Ws" together.
  • Why doesn't Boulder have a professional football team? Because then Denver would want one.
  • What do Broncos fans and laxatives have in common? Both irritate the absolute crap out of you!
  • What do you call 53 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl? The Denver Broncos.
  • What is th difference between a bucket of shit and an Denver Broncos fan? The bucket.
  • Why are Denver Broncos jokes getting dumb and dumber? Because Broncos fans have started to make them up themselves.
  • What is the difference between a Broncos fan and a baby? The baby will stop whining after awhile.
  • How many Broncos fans does it take to change a light bulb? None they are happy living in San Diegos shadow!
  • How many Denver Broncos does it take to win a Super Bowl? Only one (# 7) and he is retired.
  • Want to hear a Broncos joke? Ronnie Hillman!
  • How do you stop an Denver Broncos fan from beating his wife? Dress her in San Diego Blue and Yellow!
  • What is a Denver Broncos fan's favorite whine? "We can't beat San Diego."
  • What's the difference between Broncos fans and a litter of puppies? Eventually, the litter of puppies grows up and stops whining.
  • If you have a car containing a Broncos wide receiver, a Broncos linebacker, and a Broncos defensive back, who is driving the car? The cop.
  • How do you stop an Denver Broncos fan from beating his wife? Dress her in a Seahawks jersey.
  • What's the difference between the Denver Broncos and a dollar bill? You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
  • How do you recognize a Bronco in a department store? He's the one trying to slam the revolving door.
  • What should you do if you find three Denver Broncos football fans buried up to their neck in cement? Get more cement.
  • What's the difference between the Denver Broncos and a pinball machine? The pinball machine scores more points.
  • How many Denver Broncos does it take to change a tire? One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up.
  • How many Denver Broncos fans does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Lava lamps don’t burn out man!
  • What did the Broncos fan say after his team won the Super Bowl? "Dammit mom, why'd you wake me up? I was having an amazing dream!"
  • What does a Denver Broncos fan and a bottle of beer have in common? They’re both empty from the neck up.
  • What do the Broncos and the Post Office have in common? Neither deliver on Sundays!
  • What's the difference between an Denver Broncos fan and a carp? One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
  • What did the Denver Broncos get for trading Brandon Marshall to the Miami Dolphins? A first round pick and a felon to be named later!
  • How many Denver Broncos fans does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Lava lamps don't burn out man!
  • 68 original lines, 4 removed, 64 remaining.
  • Dear Richard Sherman, I'm getting all my "ducks" in a row.
  • Have you heard the song about the Broncos Quarterback problems? It's called "No Manning Mo Problems"
  • Q: Peyton Manning has undergone successful surgery to relieve a pain in his neck...It's called Richard Sherman!
  • Why is Ronnie Hillman like a grizzly bear? Every fall he goes into hibernation.
  • Why do ducks fly over INVESCO Field upside down? There's nothing worth craping on!
  • How are the Broncos like my neighbors? They can't pick up a single yard!
  • What do the Denver Broncos and the mailman have in common? Neither deliver on Sunday night.
  • Why do Denver Broncos fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards? So they can park in handicap spaces.
  • How do you casterate an Denver Broncos fan? Kick his sister in the mouth
  • What do you call a Denver Bronco in the Super Bowl? A referee.